Has it occurred to you that the reason you may not be accepted fully by society is not due to a lack or insufficiency in yourself or in your gifts but rather a fear on the part of the mainstream culture of your immense shining gifts? Your immense radical hard won and wilderness strewn luminous gifts maybe a terror to the mainstream society.
You may take this terror as a rejection or a devaluing or shaming of your gifts and in a sense this is the case and in a sense it isn’t; in a sense its a misperception. It is the holy terror of your gifts which compels the mainstream culture to disparage them.
But under this terror their may be a longing, a lustrous shining grief filled need for your gifts. Your strange gifts may be that very medicine which the culture as a whole needs to resolve its problems and conflicts. Your gifts may be what the culture needs to heal its wounds.
You, ragged wanderer, are the one who is able to feel all the depth of our immense pain and transform it into beauty and medicine, you are the wine we thirst to drink and the bread we long to eat; you are frightening truth and you are the balm for all our pain.
Your gifts may be like a sun, a sun that has been placed in a cage. If it so happens that you are rejected and your gifts devalued, recognize that in a sense the rejector is merely a threshold guardian like the monstrous carvings of demons that stand outside the holy temple.
You must pass by these guardians to enter the initiation temple and make your offerings and your offerings to the people and to the Gods. Pass the wasteland and the threshold guardians outside the temple; this wasteland is like the apparitions which appeared to the Buddha prior to his enlightenment, they are like the wasteland outside the castle of the Grail. Recognize the worth, the value the sufficiency, the love of the wyrdness, the diversity that is your essence, your beauty.
Now open to the tribe’s return gifts. You don’t have to strive and struggle and ‘try’ forever to prove yourself worthy of the tribe’s love. Just simply see the beauty, feel the trust in the sufficiency of your wyrd, your beingness and the tribe’s return gifts will flow, will be drawn towards it like a river to the sea. Within the temple, they will rain wild, strange, unusual abundance and bounty upon you.